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If Men Are Dogs, Women Are Snakes

“My wife can never cheat on me.” (said with conviction).

Those were the words of one of my older friends when asked if his future wife would ever cheat on him. So I asked him why he felt that way, “why don’t you think your wife will ever cheat on you?”. His response? “Women just don’t cheat like that.” I coughed, scratched my neck, turned around to make sure I was the only one that heard such a naive statement, and proceeded to laugh like I was watching an old school episode of Papa Ajasco. I can’t believe he just said that…
like, u no dey watch Desperate Housewives? or Snapped? Or have u been living under a rock for most of your life? But then again, it dawned on me that a good number of men feel that way – that their women can’t cheat or that for some reason women don’t have urges to just creep with Jose the gardener, or Monday the house boy. If they only knew.

They say experience is the best teacher, and as cliche as that sounds, it truly is. My lesson came at the hands of my first girlfriend in college. I was just as naive as my dear friend mentioned above. So when my girlfriend told me she was virgin and that she was saving herself for marriage, and all that good stuff, I believed it – swallowed and digested it like it came straight from the Bible. Turned out that she was giving the goods to some other guy that I knew, and I was there forming holy holy, and playing patient, understanding boyfriend. Yeah I know – just low.

Funny thing is that I didn’t know until about 3-4 months after we broke up. It’s so interesting how the victim is the last one to know. Anyway, these days when a girl tells me she’s a virgin, I smile, and sarcastically reply“I’m a virgin also. We’re all virgins…lol.” Sorry, but the only virgin I know is the Blessed Virgin Mary.
I bring this up as my own personal example of how some women (not all) can be very sneaky, and deceitful. I was being nosey today on some blogs, and came across very interesting gist on Linda Ikeji’s blog about Ikechukwu’s (Killz) girlfriend cheating on him with his good friend. According to Linda Ikeji, his facebook status after he found out, read:

“Kills is single. Women cheat and with your friend too?Of all the women out there, aint life grand ?…. Men and women are equally animals when they choose to be. ” Wow. Looks to me that Killz didn’t see this coming at all. That had to hurt.

The common notion has been, and to a certain degree still is, that men are dogs, men cheat without any remorse, and women are innocent victims that deal with these useless men, and get hurt time and time again, while remaining so faithful to their spouses. Really? I personally disagree. Ido think men cheat, but I also think women cheat too… probably just as much as men do. The difference? Women cover their tracks very well. They have a lie to cover the lie that covers the first lie. They never confess….EVER!, and their stories always line up perfectly – well, almost perfectly.

As my homeboy would say, “a woman can sleep with someone and pretend it never happened, and just like that, it never happened.” Women are just plain sneaky… kinda like snakes. Men on the other hand, are like dogs. Some men will hump some and everything that has a female reproductive system. They will probably leave traces all over the place, fumble on lies, and tell lies that don’t even make sense – like “I was watching the game at my friend’s place”… even though she knows fully well that the game ended 4 hours ago. Just like dogs, men commit the crime and leave the evidence hanging all over the place. It’s just plain pitiful sometimes.

Bottom line is that women might not necessarily cheat more than men, but they sure do cheat better than men do.
So as I conclude this post while listening to TLC’s song Creep , I can’t help but think, If I had spent more time listening to the lyrics of that song, instead of dancing the butterfly, I might have learned a thing or two about women creeping, and saved myself some harsh lessons. Or maybe I would’ve just learned the way I did – via experience.

Your thoughts…
who cheats more? who cheats better? who rarely cheats? who is more of the victim?

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